The hours and days seem to be running together as Shelly and I sit together in Philip’s room. We tell him how much we love him and that we know how much he loves us. We kiss him and hug him, we reminisce and we sing songs. He occasionally opens his eyes and tries to say something ,but it usually comes out as grunts. We really think he might be understanding some of what we are saying to him. Sometimes, we sit quietly and just let him rest.  The doctors tell us there is no possibility that he can recover. His body is being kept alive by machinery; his lungs are being aided by a breathing machine, his kidneys are no longer working and a dialysis machine is doing all of the work, his liver is failing, he is unable to take in anything into his stomach  because the digestive system has shut down. My heart is breaking as I watch my sweet son being held up by machinery and medication.

I always promised him that I would tell him the truth about his condition, which I have done. I can’t really say how much he understands and yet on some level I feel that he knows. The understanding we had between us was that I would not keep him alive if he were to become more dependent; yet, he still opens his eyes and makes contact.  My heart and soul are breaking, I want to do the right thing by him. Yet, where there is life there is hope.  We need G-d’s intervention.


  1. I will be away from Charlotte for the New Year but my thoughts and prayers are with you. I know there’s nothing I can say to ease your pain, but I do feel blessed that I met Phil and spent some alone time with him.


  2. Dear Sperlings,
    You are not alone, HaShem is with us all the time. I cannot know how you are feeling. I can only pray for an immediate miracle for Pesach Yaakov ben Raisa Pesh, one we can all see and understand.
    I send you love and strength,
    Sarah Rochel

  3. We are heartbroken from your last post. How can a person read your tender words, and not be moved by the compassion and dedication that you display? We are honored to be Phil’s friends, and wish you peace and strength in the days to come. A miracle would certainly be most welcome, so may it be G-d’s will!

    Love, Rebecca, Issy, Dalia and Ilan Cheskes

  4. Like the others, we continue to pray. I totally believe that Phil is hearing and understanding you. As miserable as this is, I know that you are doing everything the right way and providing incredible comfort to Phil.
    Janice and gang

  5. My heart is aching along with yours. I am sending love to you. I too believe Phil hears you. May Hashem bless you and keep you. Cindi Powell

  6. Amy & Jeffrey Becker

    Our hearts are breaking with you as our sweet and gentle Phil struggles so much for life. We continually say our prayers for a miracle. We are here for you and love you all so much.

  7. Mr. & Mrs. Sperling, You both are incredible human beings and giving Philip your all, all your love, honesty, devotion, affection, kindness and compasion. I am still praying for him and for a miracle from Jehovah Jireh, our provider. love & hugs, Lois

  8. Sarah Malka & Larry Margolis

    Our prayers continue for Pesach Yaakov ben Reizel Pesha and for all of you. We also believe that Phil hears you and that he is communicating with you. IYH, I will be in Durham tomorrow (Thursday) morning. If you need anything and/or a visit, I am there, or if you need family time to be alone, I understand that also. Please let me know if there is anything I can do. I will try and call as I am finishing in Durham. Love and hugs, Sarah Malka & Larry

  9. Randy, got home too late tonight to call. So many people sending love your way. If only it could save Philip. Everyone here is praying and knowing that you will continue to make the right choices for your beloved son. At the end of the day you need to feel confident that you made all the right choices for him. We all know that and I am certain than Philip knows that too. He has always been so appreciative of everything you have done for him over the years. He knows you and Shelly are the best! He has been a delicious soul and he is in all of our hearts as he fights for his life. Know that you are not alone as I embrace you with all of my loving heart and soul. You know how much you mean to me and I wish I could be there with you to help ease your pain.
    I will see you soon.

  10. Speak words of encouragement to him so that his spirit will not give up.

  11. When the time comes, let him know that it is okay to go to be with HaShem.

  12. dear randy and shelly,
    thank you so much for sharing with me last night.
    i know that you both continue to create a very warm, truly caring, extremely loving environment for philip – something you have always done for him as well as lee and danny. that is your nature – so caring, so loving, so protective, so devoted to your children and eachother. i too have been blessed with being showered with those feelings from you. when we were on the phone several nights ago and i heard you singing to phil in your beautiful voices, i felt like i was there with you, sharing in singing to phil with you.
    my dearest flipper, randy and shelly – you know i have always been right there with you – from the day we met in la jolla. we have always shared the happy times and the sad times of our lives. my arms are wrapped so very tightly around you, my heart is open to you, and i am showering you with all my love. i do wish i could physically be there with you.
    i love you my dearest friends – robbin

  13. Friends, you can register for an organ donor card from the Halachic Organ Donor Society. Rabbi Groner says it is ok to do so.
    Go to
    It’s quick, it’s easy, and it saves lives!


  14. My heart is breaking with yours. Our prayers are with Philip and the entire family.
    Shoshana, Robert & Tova Shlian

  15. I keep praying for you and am heartbroken that you all are going through this. You are such strong and supportive parents, Philip is lucky to have you by his side.

  16. you are doing the right thing by phillip as you always have. how lucky is phillip to have such a wonderful mother. you have so made his life better. be proud and be strong. i know i am proud of you. feel all the stregnth from all your friends. love, marcelle

  17. Dear Randy,i am so sorry for what you and your family have to endure at this time .Wish there was something i could do to help ,as always prayer is the healer,just know everyone in Jackie’s dance is praying for Philip and your family . May you find some peace to know that others care. Sharon

  18. My heart aches for all of you. My love and Prayers for a miracle continue. Although, you are not alone, this is so horrible. We need G-d to give us all a miracle. Love to all of you, Aunt Renee

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